It’s almost 2010! I wish everyone a very happy, healthy, and prosperous New Year.
I’m not usually one to make New Year’s resolutions. I don’t like making resolutions solely for the sake of tradition … only to break them about two weeks later. However, I fairly regularly set goals for myself throughout the year. They can be small ones like cleaning out a closet by the end of the week or much bigger ones like pushing through social anxiety to attend parties. I’ve had varying degrees of success and some I have to try over and over (anyone remember my goal of trying to drink more water?).
This year however, I will be joining in trying to turn over a new leaf in the New Year. Maybe a few leaves. My self-challenge is to find Balance. I mean this in several ways. I’d like to achieve better balance in a physical sense – I’m incorporating stretching, flexibility, and core/balance exercises into my normal cardio and strength training routines. But perhaps more importantly I want to strike a better balance in other areas of life as well.
I have a tough time relaxing and enjoying the moment. I’m always thinking a thousand steps ahead, worrying about everything, and pushing to accomplish just one more thing before I collapse into bed. Maybe it will sound odd to some, but it’s going to be an incredibly difficult struggle to kick back and relax on a regular basis. And as much as I want to, it’s daunting.
So what does this mean? Well, a few examples of concrete goals I’m setting for myself are:
- Take another real vacation like I did when I was on my honeymoon, meaning no internet access – no blogging, no emails, no editing, no worries for a few days. Disconnect and rediscover the offline world on occasion. Nothing terrible will happen. Errr … right?
- Put together a schedule and establish more clear work hours (easy part), downtime (hard part), and stick to it (really hard part). This may mean occasionally being a day late on a blog post or in replying to an email if other responsibilities need to take priority and take up more time. It doesn’t at all mean that I don’t care, it only, only, only means that I’m working on finding that elusive balance and can’t cram everything into 24 hours sometimes no matter how hard I try.
- For the time being, I’m going to let my MySpace and FetLife accounts go quiet and I won’t take up Twitter. I’ve already done so recently for the most part, but I’ve felt guilty about it. The goal is to feel ok with it. I’ll leave the profiles up in case I wish to become active again in the future, but I won’t be logging in for messages. Please email me instead and I promise I will reply. Oh, the only exception to my MySpace goal is that I will log in to leave comments on Erica’s blog because that is one of the primary reasons I made a MySpace profile in the first place. 
- Play piano, draw, dust off my violin, read, take photos, hike, sew, listen to music, garden, play with the cats, take a bubble bath, watch TV, see a movie, or any number of other activities that have taken a far backseat for a while now. Do them, enjoy them, and not try to rush through as fast as I can so that I can get on to the next thing on my to-do list. In other words, chill.
So why am I posting about this here? Well, because 1) it’s my blog and I wanted to 2) I wished to post an explanation of why I’m not active on FetLife and MySpace and state that there may be subtle changes in response time to comments and emails and 3) so that I’ll be more likely to stick to my resolutions. It helps to firmly establish a goal by writing it down. It really helps to establish it by writing it down and posting it for any and all to see! Hopefully that will result in both encouragement and motivation.
I won’t be getting spanked for breaking any of these “rules” or failing to meet goals though. While a good spanking can help act as a motivating factor or reminder to get back on track in some cases, I’m not sure this is one of them for me. But hopefully by achieving better balance, it will help me to continue to be healthier, happier, and continue to love life – both the vanilla and spanking sides – to the fullest.
December 30th, 2009 - 9:08 pm
I can understand the need for balance, Pixie. I sometimes feel I’m neglecting some peace of mind because I feel guilty about sitting too much. The old “why aren’t you..?” demons start showing up again.
I respect your goals to enjoy a large variety of things. I know you care. Your emails are proof of that..:) Who do I confide in more than you?
I really hope you have a super new year’s celebration in whatever way makes you happiest. I care too…:)
See ya!
December 30th, 2009 - 10:04 pm
I think for someone with so much talent, smarts, interests, creative impulses, caring about others, and great things going on in your life, it’s hard to cram it all in. There must always be a feeling that there isn’t enough time in the day. It’s wise to slow down a bit and enjoy more what you have. I hope this will be a great 2010 for you, Pixie.
December 31st, 2009 - 1:24 am
For someone who is “not usually one to make New Year’s resolutions,” it sounds as if you have made quite a few. And they sound like good ones. I’ve lurked here a long while and have only recently started posting. For what it’s worth, I have read and enjoyed your posts for a few months now. And you seem like a very level-headed girl with a great outlook on life. Also, if it helps you to sleep better at night, my wife are active in a cat rescue group. In the past year and a half, we’ve placed more than 60 cats and kittens in permanent homes. Happy New Year pixie!
December 31st, 2009 - 1:26 am
i want to wish you a very happy new year andi hope all or most of your goals are met. reading your blog was almost like a mirror image of me,the male version. what you say in it,its me too. so im like you,im gonna try and chill alot more in 2010,both in the vanilla and spanking life. i truly believe in spankings,but theres so much more,besides. im now writing goals out like you said. so lets hope our goals are metin 2010.
December 31st, 2009 - 1:27 am
I meant to say, “my wife and I are active in a cat rescue group.”
December 31st, 2009 - 2:06 am
Awwwww, Pixie!
That part about logging on to MySpace just to leave me blog comments made me smile so big.
I would say these are very good goals. Slowing down a little, taking time to simply enjoy your life, your hobbies, whatever you want, is important. Life flies by so quickly.
Happy 2010 to you, sweet girl!
December 31st, 2009 - 6:50 am
Pixienice post as usualand i wish you a very happy new year sweetie and all at p.b. and your family ,yes balance is right you give us all here much pleasure indeed but you must think of yourself ,love and spanks from tim xxxxxx
December 31st, 2009 - 7:24 am
Happy New Year to all, Happy New decade too, the last one was about the worst since the Black Death was around. Sounds like you need to center yourself Amber. I’m not one to talk [Type A Manhattanite], but have you considered meditation? Okay, end of my sermon, I will hold good thoughts for you.
December 31st, 2009 - 9:28 am
Yes
Balance is always the most difficult part of a modern life. We always over balance at least one part of life, according to our talents and the little psychic demons which rule from the unconscious places.
Would that I knew the answers, I know a small part of them, long endurance and a lot of reading. I know that what must be in balance are the four parts of the personality. Body, Mind, Heart, and Spirit.
Find the discipline in each part and set goals for each. You might condiser how each part is expressed when you feeling balanced. I discovered that my personality was balanced in the little rubric below.
Body of a soldier, Mind of a teacher, Heart of a poet, Spirit of a servant.
Divide the goals of the year into month , week, day, hour, minute, breath.
Finding in reflection in how to use each, start with a weekly plan that has some of each, and work that into daily goals, something for each part each day.
The goals of balance are Joy and Serivce. First believe it can be done, imagine a world in which it works.
December 31st, 2009 - 10:06 am
There’s actually a symbol for what you are describing – yin/yang or “bi-polar” if you will. The point of the analogy is that in yin/yang the two opposites combine to create a whole, or, in this context, the various tasks and activities you undertake create a tapestry that forms your life. If one aspect gets out of balance then the whole becomes distorted.
More practically, try rediscovering the things that gave you greatest pleasure first, then move on to incorporating other stuff. This way you’re more likely to find a workable counterweight to the Internet addiction business.
I hope you and your family have a happy and prosperous 2010.
December 31st, 2009 - 12:54 pm
good for you . i hope it all works out i know how hard resolutions are to keep.
very inspiring.
wow
December 31st, 2009 - 2:35 pm
Hello Pixie
Happy New Year, and good luck with your new resolutions it sounds
like you have every thing under control.
I am looking forward to a new year of Spanking Pixie,and Punished
Brats.
Have a wonderful New Year
Love
AK
December 31st, 2009 - 2:56 pm
hi punkin,
i’m back from housesitting.
i’ll get to an email about that dusty voilin and films[1st run majors] soon. no answer will be needed.
know that we all love you and wish you a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
ddon
December 31st, 2009 - 3:31 pm
Wishing you a very happy new year for all the happiness you’ve bestowed on us. Resolutions tend not to be honored to the letter, but serve as guidelines and yours are healthy ones. But mostly continue to do what you’ve done for a long while now — enjoy life and love.
December 31st, 2009 - 4:34 pm
Happy New Year, my dear Pixie. Love your blog, and appreciate all you have done in the past year to advance the spanking cause. I know you have given me a lot to think about. I’m looking forward to 2010. Take care.
Harry
December 31st, 2009 - 8:27 pm
Pixie..As I feel safe in saying that we will all miss yoour 100% dedication to things But we do understand that sometimes it is nessasary to take some “me” time. I just excepted a new position at work and I have been running myself ragged, it has even come to the point where I was trying to figure out a way to unjury myself just to get out of going to work ..I know that seems silly but I needed me time. So as we will miss your dedication I do understand..ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!
December 31st, 2009 - 11:59 pm
Pixie,
While you have demonstrated such loyalty and generosity to your fans & friends, you must take care of yourself first because no one else will. Congrats on your decision to seek a better balance in your life. You should not in any way feel guilty about your decision; you have contributed more than anyone could ever expect and we all so appreciate everything you do.
Kim
January 1st, 2010 - 4:57 am
Happy New Year, Pixie!
Taking the time for some “Pixie Time” is a wonderful idea. Anytning that leads to a healthier, happier Pixie is not only good for you, but good for all of us, as well. I know I, for one, want you to keep on doing what you do best for a long, long time to come.
Dr. Ken
January 1st, 2010 - 12:52 pm
Getting the work/life balance sorted out does sound like a good Idea, I get the impression that a fair few people working in your industry get a bit burnt out. Here’s hoping that you can find that happy state of affairs that you are looking for.
Prefectdt
January 1st, 2010 - 1:17 pm
Wonderful resolutions. In my point of view you certainly earned them. Time for yourself, together with the ones you love.
And YES…! Do drink more fresh water and leave the Coca Cola Light OUT of our body. It is addictive and incredibly bad for your well-being. When you go to “alternative sites” you can read how bad it really is.
You’ve given us one of the best spanking sites on the Internet (if not the best) and to be able to continue giving us such a great site you simply NEED to make such resolutions as you did.
You’re a wonderful woman, willing to share so much with so many…
THANK YOU..!!!
Erik aka Funbun
January 1st, 2010 - 3:03 pm
PIxie,
I plan on e-mailing you personally (my first and probably most obtainable goal..lol) but I also wanted to comment here publicly on some of remarks in this post …
First this is one of your best posts in that it is honest and something (other than spanking) that we all deal with and either have gone through, are going through now or WILL go through in the future. It shows that YOU as well as (at least) most of your readers, posters and friends are so much more … dare I say DEEPER than just a bunch of spankos looking for a “fix”, obsessed only with spanking related topics. Spanking may be a big part of our lives and interests, but we have the same desires to obtain our goals and seek a life of happiness and a feeling of accomplishment. In other words we have all the “normal” feelings and emotions PLUS we are not afraid to share our closets and admitt they are OUR closets!!
Achieving “balance” is one of those things that sounds good but we may not all have the same definition. IMHO achieving the desire to attempt to find balance is more satisfying than actually KNOWING I have achieved “balance.” I’m not afraid to fail, to have to start over or to make changes that will take me in a different direction than I have been going in order to discover that which I have not experienced but which makes me feel … more coplete in who I want to be. It’s impossible for anyone to know when I’ve achieved balance except for me. I may satisfy my family and friends but if I’m not satisfied than I’ve made no progress.
Although our friendship may soon end, I want to just say that I admire you for all that you have shared in these posts and in the private e-mails I have recieved from you. As you know, we share so much more than just a common interest in spanking.
I’ll e-mail you more in private!!
Huggs,
Linde
January 2nd, 2010 - 1:55 am
Hi Pixie Happy New Year! I always admired you’re hard work on your body and your blog and sites! I know how hard is to stay balanced and know you’ll find yours. I just took a candlelit bath and thought of you!
January 2nd, 2010 - 6:43 am
Pixie, as always, I wish you all of the very best in this New Year — in the totality of your life, the quality and enjoyment of which will only improve as you make progress toward this very well-chosen resolution.
I can’t recall for sure if you have mentioned ever doing them before, but yoga, in all of its forms (bodily positions, breathing techniques, meditation), can be extremely effective in improving balance — truly in every sense of the word: Your physical posture and coordination, your thoughts and emotions, your life and all of its activities.
Just a suggestion. However you work toward your goal, by taking more meaningful time for yourself, you become even better, for yourself and for everyone else whose life you touch. Again, I wish you the very best.
January 2nd, 2010 - 8:19 am
hi punkin,
listen to funbun!!!!! try herbal and exotic teas, hot and iced. visit an asian grocer store. everything is sooo much cheaper.
a small investment will set you up for 3-6 months. 5 lb. lo mein noodles [$5] a gal. of soy sauce [$9],1/2 gal. dark soy sauce [ $5-6], a plastic butter tub of dry mustard [$1-2], large bottles of rice wine, rice viniger, oyster sauce, fish sauce, et al [&1-2]. cans of leechy’s [$1.88], fresh star apples. loads of curry powders.
learn chow and you’ll never have to wonder what to do with leftovers. they become pixies house special lo mein du jour.
i think you’ve got ballance,…just get rid of the tightrope.
best,
ddon
no need to buy an asian cookbook you’ve got the web.
January 2nd, 2010 - 4:35 pm
The Power Of Now
by
Erhart Tolle
January 2nd, 2010 - 5:27 pm
Hey Pixie, I’m glad you are taking charge of your life and figuring out what matters most to you and not spreading yourself so thin. It’s the same for me with Myspace. Erica is the only reason I’m on there. I hope this year brings you all the good things you want and need. Warm Hugs! ~Juju
January 2nd, 2010 - 6:14 pm
I like your list of goals, but please, please, please…. when it comes to these three — “…play with the cats, take a bubble bath, watch TV” — STOP DOING THEM SIMULTANEOUSLY. It’s just not safe.
-Alan
January 3rd, 2010 - 3:52 am
thinking of you pixie
January 3rd, 2010 - 5:05 am
The picture accompanying this posting shows you with shorter hair than usual. Why did you cut your beautiful long hair?
January 3rd, 2010 - 8:58 am
Denis, I don’t think her hair is shorter .. It’s just tied up in the back like us girls do to keep it out of the way at the gym.
The only think wrong with the picture above is that the negative is backwards (or Pixie wears shirts with strange encoded messages lol)
And .. NO I haven’t written that personal letter to you yet, Pixie!!
Linde
January 3rd, 2010 - 9:12 am
Yet again I hear exactly where you’re coming from. You wouldn’t be the interesting, successful person you are if you weren’t busy – all interesting people are busy! So don’t beat yourself up over that too hard – I suspect that never having enough hours in the day is the price you pay for living your dream and running your own business.
But I hear you on that elusive balance. It may take longer than a year to get it right. I figure I’ll probably still be working it out when I’m fifty! But downtime is really important, for your mental and physical health, and I wish you all the best in caring for yourself and carving out leisure time. Hope 2010 is a chilled, happy year for you and yours
January 3rd, 2010 - 2:52 pm
Those who love you will understand your need to spread yourself more evenly for a healthier happier you. I’d be pleased to see you worry less in your efforts at making some sort of balance in all you do. I wish you many good girl spankings along the way to encourage your progress (((((((HUGS)))))))
January 3rd, 2010 - 3:43 pm
dani – I hope that you will give yourself permission for some downtime too in this coming year.
dana – Thank you. Yes, I am blessed to have so many good things going on. I do need to take the chance to slow down once in a while and simply enjoy them.
Biker – That’s wonderful news. Thank you to you and your wife for helping find loving homes for so many needy cats.
Hairbrushman – I wish you all the best and much luck in achieving your goals for 2010 too.
Erica – I mean it! I have felt bad that I haven’t commented more often because I’d then feel pressured to do all of the other MySpace stuff too and that’s not really fair to either one of us. So, I’ll use MySpace for what makes me happiest and that is to read and comment on your blog posts.
tim – Happy New Year to you too!
karaJ – Type A’s unite!!! I haven’t tried meditation per se. I have tried deep breathing as needed to calm down and tried to zip off to my “happy place” when I’m feeling stressed out and unable to remove myself from the situation (like riding in a car full of bickering people). But meditating is something that I think will have to come a little later once I’ve learned to be ok in sitting and relaxing a little.
Jeoffry – Yes, you are right. I think even with dividing my personality into those four parts though, I need to remind myself that none will be accomplished if I don’t balance myself within each category. For example, the body cannot be that of a soldier without both physical challenge and rest and nourishment.
rob – Absolutely. I know there are many things that I love and want to do or experience but I simply need to give myself permission to put them first once in a while.
rtg – Resolutions are tough to keep and no doubt I will falter. The key is to not throw in the towel but to try again.
AK – thank you. And yes, there will be lots of good things coming up in 2010.
ddon – I hope you are enjoying getting settled back in at home. Happy New Year to you.
CurtisG – Wow thank you!!!
harry – thanks. I greatly enjoy blogging and it would simply not be the same without the interaction and input from readers like you. I look forward to continuing to chat about spanking and vanilla life too here in 2010.
mudd – Don’t worry. As I said, the changes will be subtle and I will still be giving everything my 100% dedication. I simply won’t be giving it 150% which then leads to burnout which then leads to 0% because I can’t keep up that pace. I hope you’ll find the time to unwind a bit too as we all need quality “me time”.
Kim – Awwww thanks!!! You’re right about having to take care of yourself first on occasion. Not feeling guilty will be a struggle, but I think it’s simply a part of the challenge of change.
Dr. Ken – thank you!!! I’m right there with you. I want to keep going like the Energizer bunny and simply need to pace myself in order to do so.
Prefectdt – Yes, burn out is common, but I don’t think it’s limited to this industry alone. I know that I became burned out when working in clinical and that most people in any job or situation can become overwhelmed at times. But although it’s definitely work, what I do for PB is certainly one of the most enjoyable jobs I’ve had and I treasure this opportunity.
Funbun – I have been incorporating more water into my diet especially with all of my time spent being a gym rat, but I have not given up Diet Coke entirely. I’m hoping I can be balanced there as well. Having a couple cans a day is far better than a case!
Linde – Just got your email. Thanks! I will reply to you very soon, I promise. Wow. I’m so happy that you and so many others really related to my rather personal post. I never can be certain how things will be received and interpretted, but I’m incredibly thankful that you and so many others have provided encouragement and support!!
amberdawn – Happy New Year to you too! I hope you enjoyed every moment of your candlelit bath. That sounds heavenly.
Jeff – I have recently started yoga and love it. It’s wonderful because it helps me stretch and balance and is active enough to appease the demon that tells me I must constantly be busy and productive but is calming enough to allow me to focus and become centered.
ddon – not too many asian grocers out this way, I’m afraid. I do enjoy lots of fresh local produce when it’s in season. Best stuff ever.
sir funkytown – I’ve heard of that. I’m currently reading another book that has referenced the one you mentioned. I may get that one next.
Juju – Hehehe. We don’t want MySpace, we want EricaSpace.
Alan – Shoot, I knew I was doing something wrong. I guess multitasking isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.
Crystal – Thanks! Hope you are doing well.
Denis – Linde is right. No cut, I’m wearing a ponytail as I am mid-workout in this picture at the gym.
Pandora – I’m not at all surprised that you can relate! You often seem to have a lot going on too. And thank you for the reminder that it may take a while to really make the change and establish proper balance. It definitely would be counterproductive to beat myself up for essentially constantly beating myself up! But if I’m not careful, that’s exactly what I’d do.
I hope 2010 is great for you too.
2Good – Thank you! Now those are spankings that would be welcomed.
January 15th, 2010 - 5:38 pm
Pixie
I admire your new years resolution. I think that a lot of people can let work consume them, and we forget to focus on the health of our private lives!
While we may miss you at times, you must always put yourself first! All us fans will always be here!
Great blog and topics! Always look forward to your updates!
DL