Pain is a funny thing – and in this case I mean as in odd, not as in Three Stooges funny. I find pain to be vital to a good spanking experience for me. I’m never quite sure how to react when I’m only being patted. Does the spanker want me to react as if I’m at my very limit anyway or is he hoping that I’m going to purr and ooh with pleasure or is he perhaps waiting for me to make a snarky comment about butterflies landing on my butt so he can feel safe in kicking it up a notch?
Anyway, when I’m being spanked, I prefer to have at least a moderate amount of discomfort. I want to feel truly punished and the experience to have an air of authentic discipline no matter what the set up. I think I have a pretty fair tolerance, but I am definitely not a “pain slut” as has been suggested to me before. The pain itself doesn’t do it for me. It’s merely a single factor that contributes to the overall positive experience.
And right now, it’s never been more clear that anything I get out of pain is solely limited to the realm of spanking. I’m in a good bit of discomfort at the moment for completely non-spanking related reasons and the only thing it’s contributing to right now is making me frustrated and a bit sad. I won’t go into boring details about what’s currently causing the distress, but no matter what the vanilla ache or injury, I’m not fond of it. I could whine over a scratched finger or bumped shin, but when a post-spanking attempt to sit causes me to wince a little? Well, I’ll probably still whine, but I’ll do so with a sly smile.
Since I’m a spankee only, I wonder if the enjoyment of spanking related pain is only limited to the bottom. If I tried to give a spanking, I think the spankee would be very unfortunate as I’d quickly move on to an implement to spare my hand the discomfort. I don’t feel the desire to have my hand hot and burning like my bottom, but as I said, that might very well be because I’m not a spanker by nature.
So tell me, if you’re one that enjoys getting spanked, do you find that you can handle repeated hard swats to your bottom and yet cringe at the thought of a papercut? And if you’re one that likes to give spankings, do you enjoy the pain sensation on your hand after a good bit of play?
June 18th, 2009 - 9:21 am
pixie hope you are better soon dear ,you know we are all very fond of you interesting post it all depends on the individual i suppose love and spanks ,tim xxxx
June 18th, 2009 - 11:21 am
I can’t say that I enjoy pain in places other than my bum, but I do derive a certain amount of satisfaction from being stoic and being able to take it without complaint. it isn’t a good pain like spanking pain, but on a certain level, it can be a little bit fulfilling.
Pain in my body that I don’t understand is scary. Once I know the cause, I am okay with it and will tough it out.
Hugs,
Hermione
June 18th, 2009 - 11:36 am
I switch, so I have both perspectives. As a bottom, only a pain in the ass does it for me. Any other type of pain seems out-of-place, and is not welcome. When topping, I do not find the sting to my hand particularly exciting, but that may be because I don’t top that often so I’m not “in shape.” Like you, pixie, I prefer a paddle (or other implement) that also seems to impart the sting that the spankee desires.
June 18th, 2009 - 12:51 pm
As solely a top, I do get some satisfaction from the pain I feel when giving a hand spanking. I like having a gauge as to what the lady across my lap is feeling, and it makes it more of a shared experience. Usually the pain in my hand doesn’t last very long after the spanking is over, but once I did break a blood vessel in my finger during a particularly sound spanking. The lady on the receiving end of that spanking wasn’t very sympathetic as she couldn’t sit comfortably for a couple of days.
June 18th, 2009 - 12:58 pm
well punkin,
another great topic.
since i will never get 2 1 of ur parties [the idea of a party in the foothills of n. carolina is unimagineable] my thots r moot.
i will hypothosize that were i to b at 1, & being a complete newbie, that were a lovely girl 2 ask me if i wanted 2 play [& i have the devils own time trying to equate playing with spanking] i would overanylize the situation [gee she's pretty red now, i don't want 2 b a hog..etc] 2 the point where the girl would turn her head & yell “will u just get on with it”!
i can say that my concern with ur pain would certianly b paramount.
u girls “in the scene” , as it were, must all b like brooke shields in pretty baby when, after her strapping, the madame says “hard headed & hard assed”.
it’ll b fun 4 me 2 read what u real people have 2 say.
i hope richard gets lots of support in his new project,
best always,
ddon ohh…stick with yahoo 4 now.
June 18th, 2009 - 1:57 pm
You OK, hon? I hope you feel better soon.
I love spanking pain. I hate any other kind of pain. First sign of a headache, I’m running for the Advil bottle. I’m terrified of the dentist.
But that sting, that burn, that deep-down muscle ache that sets in a day later? I need that. Like you, there has to be some pain in order to make the experience fulfilling. But it must be good pain. A strap landing squarely across my bottom? Good pain. A strap wrapping all the way around my right hip? Baaaaaaad pain.
June 18th, 2009 - 2:42 pm
I live with pain ALL the time as I have fibromyalgia (can’t spell it for beans)anyway I luckily have a mild form of fibro and spanking really helps it! Yipee but of course since I am not as yet 24/7 with my Sir I don’t get spanked near enough! I love the pain from a spanking whether is be a good one or not,helps to keep me centered.
June 18th, 2009 - 2:42 pm
I’ve never spanked to the point of having a sore hand…at least in terms of duration. I’ve found that if you ‘do it right” (i.e., keep your hand relaxed, use the wrist, etc.) that it’s possible to give a lengthy spanking with no lingering issue. This doesn’t include the errant smack…I’ve never hurt myself spanking, but I’ve also played hand drums off and on for years, and an errant stroke can lead to a burst blood vessel, like someone mentioned above.
June 18th, 2009 - 3:30 pm
Pixie,
To me, it all goes back to something being consensual. Ritual also plays a part in the pleasure aspect.
Of course, pain by itself has nothing to do with enjoyment (and I’m sorry you are hurting right now..truly).
It’s when I think that someone is having daydreams about punishing me (I’m 100% submissive), that I can go into my “Yes sir!” feeling.
The pleasure of the dominant becomes my pleasure and vice versa. It’s about giving and receiving in a nurturing way. Pain is part of this mutual understanding.
That’s just my opinion..and I hope you feel better soon!
June 18th, 2009 - 7:53 pm
Pixie,
As a Top, I see pain as a tool and not the goal of a spanking. Whether it is for play or for any of the other uses of a spanking, I see pain as a focus. In a play situation it is useful to get enough to focus by the bottom and to get her squirming and responding a little, or a lot. In spanking a bottom where the relationship is longer standing, both the physical and the emotional issues would determine the pain levels in the specific spanking situation. All this is why I’m basically a “hand” spanker, it allows the Top an immediate “feedback” on the pain level, and can make pain another shared value.
June 18th, 2009 - 8:52 pm
Apparently in the old days we were called masochists, not submissives, which I think is silly since we don’t want to be hurt, we like to be bossed-about and spanked by someone who cares for us! Once warmed-up, if it doesn’t get quite severe it can be very disappointing, but it doesn’t really feel like pain at that point… I’ve never heard of a spanker’s hand really hurting except if he/she is spanking a girl wearing jeans.
June 19th, 2009 - 12:43 am
Ah, the Three Stooges, now there were three guys who were both funny and odd at the same time!
While spanking is not slapstick or sadistic humor to me, like Larry slapping Moe for the hundredth time, pain does seem to be a curious necessity, but one I neither cherish nor dread, provided the spanking doesn’t lapse into a beating or become torture. Like you, I’m no pain slut.
If your spanking partner seems more content on patting rather than slapping hard, hard enough to elicit a reaction, he or she is either timid about hurting you or overcome by your many charms, or both.
Under most circumstances, I don’t mind the patting. Hell, most days I would take any positive attention. After all a day filled with tepid spanking has to be better than any day at work!
Perhaps where you and I differ is that the basis of my attraction to spanking is not one of punishment and discipline but rather the giving and receiving of tactile energy via the bottom, an energy that can be both given and received in an enthusiastic manner, enough so that some redness and very minor swelling occurs.
When it comes to physical discomfort, I seldom if every whine, even if the pain is considerable, like the time I had viral meningitis. That was a real butt-kicker, or should I say head banger?
So no I don’t whine over life’s papercuts. However, as a spanker, I don’t really enjoy the hot and painful sensation in my hand, which can quickly turn to numbness. Now that’s a real bummer!
June 19th, 2009 - 2:10 am
Dear Pixie–
The very first time I ever spanked someone, my hand was so sore the next day that I couldn’t use and had to quickly learn to spank with my other hand! And by the end of the weekend, both hands were pretty much useless.
Once my hands got conditioned, though, it was never that much of a problem again. Now the only time my hands hurt is if it has simply been too long between delivering spankings. Then it has to get conditioned all over again….
Dr. Ken
June 19th, 2009 - 4:14 am
First of all Pixie… hope you feel better real soon.
Had to laugh at your reaction to being “patted.” Can understand what you’re saying. Know spankers worry about spanking too hard and getting a negative reaction because of it. That can be tricky though, because you don’t want to drift too far to the other extreme. Really does help to get feedback… and to read reactions.
Love your question about the sensation a spanker feels in their hand. I personally do enjoy feeling I get in my hand after giving a spanking. It’s a neat little reminder, probably much like spankees feel in their bottom. I like to tease about my hand being sore too… lol… get some *great* eye rolls.
Really though, it takes quite a hand spanking for me to feel it at all anymore. It’s sadly pretty rare. Think my hand has been desensitized. I actually am far more feel it more in my rotator cuff these days (an old baseball injury) and I DONT like that pain at all. No warm and friendly reminder there.
So maybe that’s the way it is for spankees too. The dull pain caused from a spanking is a reminder… which is cool. Other pain though, that flashes back to other injuries and such… nothing good to remember there.
Fun topic… and again, feel better soon.
~Todd
June 19th, 2009 - 7:57 am
Pixie,
You really are unique in your ability to share with us and to be honest. We know some about the others but you truly are a friend to those “like-minded” people who experience and wonder about what the rest of the world feels. And I personally thank you for that.
I, too, am just a spankee (at least OUTSIDE of what we have called FUNishment). I can give a playful few smacks to a clothed or bare bottom but to go beyond that leaves me with envy about not being on the “recieving” end. In my world it really is better to recieve than to give. But, I wonder about what the top, the Dom, the spanker gets out the experience if it is NOT sexual in nature. Are they just sadomasochistic and consummed by the pain they give or is there some sort of “head space” they reach ….. is there such as thing as Dom-space.
That is why the best spankings I get are from people who share more than just their desire to “blister my bottm.” I CAN acquiesce just from conversation and be partly in my “space” before I go OTK or another position. If it’s not someone new, I KNOW he will adjust his speed, technique and posiby implement based on my body language? and verbal feedback. But, I also know and anticipate that very real PAIN that I will get ……. just like my body desires ….. not playful or sadistic …. but just what takes me to the “edge” and back …… and then does it again until that mutual need I have is fulfilled. If you are of faith … perhaps it is SPIRITUAL in nature!!!
But, I know it won’t go away and as long as I’m aware of the dangers of the unknown (a new person) I can experience satisfaction on a level that nothing else provides.
“We’re not all wired the same, but we do all share some parts of what make us up”
Linde
June 19th, 2009 - 10:02 am
Pixie,
I should have mentioned this before: the picture you included with this post shows not only a beautiful woman, but also a sensitive and introspective one.
Appeal comes in many different forms. I’m just crazy about you!
Do you mind if I keep it in a frame?
June 19th, 2009 - 10:52 am
Hope you’re feeling better, Pixie.
Wishing you the best!
When I mentioned the idea of spanking as discipline to one of my friends – she thought I’d lost my mind. “You are almost in tears just having your nails done,” she reminded me. Never the less, I did and I love it. (and hate it) LOL
I had my first punishment spanking last night – with a strap – and the pain was the white-hot – screaming aloud- “run, Forest, run” kind of pain. No warm-up and no light strokes….followed by Capzasin HP. After the strap, the Capzasin was quite nice in comparison. LOL
The only other pain I like is what we used to call “trading licks”. We used to see who could stand the most “punch to the shoulder pain.” I have played that as an adult ….and it’s still fun. LOL
Just DON’T touch my fingernails. LOL And paper cuts are horrific.
June 20th, 2009 - 2:40 am
Pixie – I’ve often wondered, and here is as an appropriate a place to ask as any I suppose, what is behind your reticence to do scenes featuring full or frontal nudity? I joined PB about a year ago and was disappointed with the fact that, other than one or two scenes, there was no full nudity or at least frontal (shirt on) nudity. However, after viewing the scenes you did with Dallas I noticed as well I noticed you there wasn’t any frontal nudity of you there either but the rest of the models had no reluctance to show their fronts. So I concluded it wasn’t just a Punished Brats policy but one of yours as well.
Just a general wondering.
June 21st, 2009 - 3:01 am
I can’t really say about spanking in general but when it comes to pain I am reminded of how I personally test belts for strength
I fold them in half and then strike them against my leg repeatedly. For some odd reason even though I am doing it as hard as I can it doesn’t really hurt. Maybe my strong cycling legs have something to do with it. So the only satisfaction I really get out of it is the looks on people’s faces when they see me.
I never really spanked hard with the hand….mainly because I only did it once…arg…grrrr. Anyways that was just playful spanking. However like you, and other spankos apparently, like I said hitting myself on the leg or “backside” doesn’t seem to bother me, but some other things do. I accidentally dropped a door on my hand Thursday and pinched it between another door below my hand. That did hurt, and bleed pretty good too. Also someone sliding the aluminum across my hand too fast a month or so ago sliced it pretty good and that hurt, lol. You think a paper cut is bad, try an aluminum cut.
Now, to approach this scientifically that is all lacerations while spanking would just be along the lines of bruises. I am pretty sure many would not like spankings if it broke the skin, of course what do I know…well I know one thing….what I haven’t been able to do for years….arg….(Ich müsse an meinen glücklich Ort denken….)
ok I am good, lol, in any case, take care pixie!
Liebe Grüße,
Drew Gray
June 21st, 2009 - 5:36 am
Hi Pixie!
I’m writing to say that I hope you feel better soon. I wish you well.
June 21st, 2009 - 8:40 am
Drew,
Die einzige Vergnügen Sie schlagen ihr selbst mit einem Gürtel IST DIE sieht sie bekommen?
Linde
June 21st, 2009 - 12:55 pm
Linde, Ich glaube schon, ja. Aber, vielleicht der Schmerz hat mich gefallt….man kann nie weiß. lol
However, I guess you pose a good question, and I will explain a little in English so everyone else is free to take part. I have never been interested in any spanking that is M/M or F/M, nor shall I ever, but I guess I am a little bit of a masochist. I am not going to cut myself with a knife or anything like that, but I do tend to “test belt strength” often, and I don’t complain when someone hits me…and I seem to cope well with emotional pain….hmmm maybe I am messed up. oh man, now I will have that to think about now…arg.
June 21st, 2009 - 1:13 pm
I’m sorry if you are still in pain, and I’m also sorry if my earlier email to you came off as unsympathetic, but perhaps your own willfulness played some small role here?
I mean, after the first time didn’t turn out so well, maybe you should have just given up on the idea of giving your cats a bath in the tub???!!! Just because you saw someone do it on Youtube does not mean that is it a good idea!!! The video might have been a fake, or those could have been stunt kitties!
June 21st, 2009 - 2:34 pm
Pixie–
Whatever was causing the source of your real pain, I hope it is healing up or going away, along with the frustration and sadness. That kind of pain is no fun.
To use your own example, the pain from a spanking and the pain from a papercut are two very different things. With a papercut, it’s usually self-inflicted, you’ve actually lacerated the skin, usually causing yourself to bleed, and they also tend to sting like crazy. With a spanking, the skin is smacked and the blood rushes to the surface, but that (hopefully) is as far as it goes. Also, generally a spanking is something that is being done to you by someone else, and that adds an emotional and psychological element–another dimension, really–to the growing discomfort.
It’s also that interaction with another person that makes it possibly to think about it afterward and smile.
Dr. Ken
June 21st, 2009 - 3:09 pm
A lady once said to me “I don’t enjoy being spanked, I just need it.”
June 21st, 2009 - 3:41 pm
Drew, Haben Sie jemals die Bänderprofile auf andere Bottoms. Vielleicht interessiert! Deutsche immer gut waren spankers.
To the others: Forgive me but I am just trying to find out a little more about this poster. As the comercial says, You know the Germans make good stuff. LOL
Linde
June 21st, 2009 - 11:37 pm
“Pain Slut” indeed. The very expression shows the level of ignorance that spankos are frequently up against. A spanked bottom, then, would be no more preferable than to be tied to a tree and flogged on the back, or to have large areas of skin shaved raw and then lemon juice poured over it. “It’s the pain, man, I love the pa. . . Oohh, look! Knitting needles, what fun!”
It keeps coming back to that “wiring thing”: A spanking is the thing that does it for us, in one way or another, and we derive our satisfaction (however it is individually defined) from that. And pain, at whatever level, is only one element along with headspace and a number of others that we are endlessly trying to perfect to achieve the (individually) ideal spanking experience. (I noticed at the time, Pixie, that even though the pain in the situation below was localized in the same place as the spanking, you didn’t enjoy it one little bit):
http://spankingpixie.com/2009/01/yeowch/
[The only time I gave a cat a bath I got the water so it was almost her body temperature and left the soap out. When I put her in the tub, she couldn’t feel the water, which was at her shoulder, and walked around in the “thick air” with the utmost curiosity. But you know cats have to sniff everything. By then, though, she was pretty calm and accepting of the whole affair.]
June 22nd, 2009 - 1:37 am
Linde,
Ich habe sie nie gesehen. Ich musse eine Frau kennen bevor spanking. Deswegen werde ich suche nicht dort zum spanking. Ich soll auch sagen das ich bin kein Deutschlander….bin nur ein Amerikaner das sprechen Deutsch kann. Ich habe der Sprache allein gelernt.
Und ich bin glücklich, das man will mir kennenzulernen. Du bist der erste in ungefahr drei Jahren. Alle werde zu mir sprechen wenn sie müssen doch sie wollen nicht mehr uber mich lernen.
June 22nd, 2009 - 6:37 am
Pixie look forward to your next postings ,hope you feel better, love and spanks from tim xxxx
June 22nd, 2009 - 8:34 am
i am not sure if i really like pain or not even so i know a spanking or a good spanking will cause pain and will hurt. i find it funny sometime when watching a spanking or reading a review somebody the spankee who getting spanked going to say it hurt or after being spanked they will say same thing it hurted. i do know they talking about the pain.
i also going to say lot of people who has never been spanked or not get a spanking in long time intend to forget the pain that going be involed with it and are reminded while getting spanked. but have no control to have it stop casue they getting spanking and may had desver it
but if it a fun playing playful spanking and it start to hurt they feel pain then it should stop right there and then.
so all in all if iam getting spanking i may want the pain to be there and i would want the spanking to hurt so i will feel and expereince the pain and try to reember how much pain there is so i don’t have go thru it again lol even so i may forget and have to feel and expereince it all over again. like u and all those punish brat and female spankee has to do
June 22nd, 2009 - 8:52 am
Drew,
Verzeihen Sie mir Sir! Ich habe nicht die Absicht, ziehen in ihr Leben weder verursachen sie eventuell auftretende Beschwerden. Meine deutschen Sprache ist von der Schule. Auch ich bin ein amerikanischer durch Geburt.
My sincere apologies to the rest of the people posting. I did not intend to offend anyone and I guess I’m just a natural BRAT with a tendancy towards curiosity.
June 22nd, 2009 - 10:28 am
Tim – Thank you!
Hermione – What you say makes a lot of sense. Pain can be scary. A headache that is most likely going to go away in a few hours is one thing. A toothache where you envision infection setting deeper with every passing minute is something else!
Mitch – Bottom pain is uniquely pleasurable. Sometimes if I’ve done an intense workout or an extra hilly hike and I have a sore glutes the next day, it’s oddly pleasurable because it reminds me of a spanking!
Harry – Hand spankings do offer excellent immediate feedback. And from a bottom’s perspective, it’s kind of nice to know that you really are feeling everything that you dish out and can use that to modify the intensity as needed.
Ddon – yes, I’m interested in seeing what the “real” people say too. Sigh. I need to go plug my robotic self into the wall charger now.
Erica – Thanks, I’m hanging in. Wrapping straps – very bad pain!! High paddling – extremely bad pain!!! A little fear of the good pain can be fun. Fear of the bad pain is downright terrifying.
Scunge – Spanking helps with fibro? Hmmmm. I think we need to perform some investigative research and promote fun spankings as a new health regimen.
I was just chatting with someone yesterday about cherry juice – supposedly it has properties that are very similar to the COX-2 drugs and can be a yummy way to help with pain and inflammation. Just thought I’d pass it along. Perhaps a tasty cherry snack and a warm cherry red bottom can help you when you are having a flare up.
JC – I must have wimpy hands. They sting when I clap too much at a show or concert! You sound like a natural born spanker.
dani – ritual and consent is huge! If someone were to just grab me and start whaling away on my bottom without reason or consent (which unfortunately has happened), there would certainly be no pleasure in that.
Jeoffry – That’s a very wise way of thinking about it – a tool, not the goal.
Lorraine – Submissive is a way more accurate term as compared to masochist in that case! I’m surprised that the spankings don’t hurt the hand more since there are so many nerve endings there.
Annapurna – Meningitis! And not so much as a whimper? You are incredibly stoic.
Dr. Ken – I hope that you are currently keeping your hands in tip-top spanking shape. I’d be happy to help you with your training if ever I had the chance.
Todd – It’s good when spankers exhibit caution rather than trying to swing from the rafters and scaring the spankee away or even causing serious injury. It can be tricky to try to communicate sometimes without spoiling the scene or accidentally insulting the spanker by suggesting the spanking isn’t intense enough.
I think spankers have a really tough job. They have to try to read the needs of the spankee, be firm in tone (or whatever else the spankee might be looking for), have good aim, and endure the hand pain and exertion of delivering a solid spanking. There’s a lot more to your role than just randomly swatting someone’s bottom.
Linde – I’m with you in that it can be a turn off when you get the feeling that the spanker is intent in only causing as much physical damage as possible. I prefer when there is a little more to the act – fun or discipline, I’d hope that there’d be some caring too.
Kyler – Wow!!! That sounds like a very intense first punishment spanking! The capzasin must have kept the burn going for a long time.
Dan – Actually Dan, I think it would have been most appropriate if you had sent me an email on such a matter rather than leaving a comment on my blog that didn’t pertain at all to the post. So rather than go into too much detail in my response here, the simple answer is – because it is my personal preference not to engage in overt frontal nudity and to leave the focus on the more traditional spanking target area, the backside! This is not to say that I have never considered nor am I opposed to possibly doing a fully nude scene in the future, but the primary focus would still be on my bare bottom, not so much on my breasts and my pubic area.
Schwarz – OMG. I literally cringed and made noises of sympathetic anguish in reading about your recent injuries. I definitely wouldn’t want lacerations on my bottom. But for me, even bruises to bruises, I’m far more ok with them appearing on my bottom than on my shins.
Alan – Shoot!! And to think I bought all that catnip scented Mr. Bubble for nothing now.
Dr. Ken – Yes, yes, yes!! The interaction is key to me as well. I’ve tried self-spanking in the past or “phone spanking” where I was instructed by a long-distance spanker to discipline myself. It just didn’t work for me.
Tony – So simply put and yet so accurate.
^Mike – I agree with you that it is how we are wired. I’m not sure I can figure out the exact reason why we might be wired the way we are … and I’m sure there are others out there that would love nothing more than to be tied, flogged, shaved raw, and dipped in lemon juice because that’s they way they are wired. But even if we can’t ever figure out answers to the endless whys, I hope we are successful in the goal of having our needs met safely.
MikeP – Yeah, I think we do tend to forget the pain or at least the intensity of the pain we may experience from a spanking. I think it’s a protective mechanism of the mind. It’s not such a protective mechanism of the bottom though!
June 22nd, 2009 - 12:05 pm
For me, whether it’s actually experienced or just imagined / fantasized, pain in and of itself is not at all exciting or arousing. Besides spanking, the only other pain situation which rings my chimes is so obviously connected to the spanking thing that it goes without saying: Being in a medical situation and getting a shot in the bum. As with spanking, it’s the preparation and nervous anticipation that’s the “best” part of it for me: Bending / rolling over and baring the bottom as the nurse prepares the syringe, waiting for the stick, etc. Needles in any other part of my body do nothing for me — just as getting or giving a slap on any other part of the body does nothing for me.
(This reminds of a topic suggestion I’ve been meaning to send to you for some time now: How many of us spankos have other bum-related fetishes / fixations / fascinations? For those that do, what are the common factors, if any?)
I hope you feel much better soon, Pixie. May the only pain in your life be the warm glow of a stinging bottom!
June 22nd, 2009 - 12:07 pm
Oh darn – your responses were posted just as I was typing mine! :-/
June 23rd, 2009 - 7:05 am
Pixie glad you are better take care we dont want our pixie damaged we all love and care for you cutie ,love and spanks from tim xxxx
July 31st, 2009 - 6:09 pm
I hope this response isn’t too late for this discussion. I’m a new spanko, and am just discovering the spanking world. (What a wild and crazy place!) The pain is a big question for me. I wonder about so many things – how much could I take? Do I want to experience real pain? What would it take to make me cry?
My husband is my spanker, and he’s very concerned for my well-being. He enjoys spanking but I don’t think he really has the fetish. It’s erotic for him, and he occasionally threatens to spank me for some little infraction, but our spankings are just for play. I don’t think he could really punish me, and I don’t think I want him to!
It’s been a fun adventure as we’ve explored this new marital activity. We started out with just a few experimental swats, and moved up to a couple dozen. On my birthday, I wasn’t sure I could take it but he gave me a birthday spanking of a whole 52 smacks. I survived, wow! And wanted more! Then I discovered Pixie’s 400-count spanking for charity on the internet, and realized the sky’s the limit. It’s OK to want more – even LOTS more!
But the question of pain is scary for me. I enjoy what you would call a “lighter spanking” so much that I want it to go on forever. When my husband uses his hand or a ping-pong paddle, the pain is totally tolerable and I just get overwhelmed by the erotic sensation of submission and being spanked. I love trying to look back and see the paddle come down on my bare butt. He usually spanks me over his knee so that we both know he’s in control. I yelp or moan or wriggle and just love every minute of it.
Any yet, a light spanking doesn’t quite satisfy me, like Pixie has described. In my curiosity for “more, more!”, I went and bought a leather paddle. It’s a boudoir-style paddle with a beautiful painted rose, thick but somewhat flexible. Just looking at it gives me butterflies in the stomach. So now my husband uses this most often. (This is always consensual – I let him know which one I’d prefer.)
So how does it feel? It hurts! A moderate whallop with a leather paddle stings and delivers quite an impact. I sqeak with each one. With the paddle, I finally feel like I’m getting a REAL spanking, and I can start to imagine what the girls in the videos go through. I love it almost as much as a lighter spanking. The problem is, I think I have a high pain tolerance. My husband has given me as many as 350 swats with the paddle, 50 at a time with little breathing and check-in breaks. They’ve been moderately hard, I think. He describes his job as “hard work”, and his arm and shoulder get tired. I screech and grunt and kick a lot, but I haven’t cried or even come to tears. Maybe because it’s a play or “fake” spanking, or maybe I’m just emotionally “tough” in this way. I just haven’t turned that corner into the emotional release of crying, and I’m afraid of the kind of beating it would take to get me there!
I’ve read of some women who start crying after just a few smacks, and others who say they don’t cry at all. We’re all different of course. But I wonder, what would it take to get me over that edge, and would it be worth it? Would I have major bruises, and would I be turned off of spanking forever? Any advice from the veterans out there?
July 31st, 2009 - 6:12 pm
Whoops, I just realized, I sent the wrong username and email with the last post! Still a newbie I guess. I hope my post went through. Pixie, let me know if I need to do anything differently.