How much does cultural influence play a role in what implements you enjoy (watching, using, experiencing) most?  For example, the cane and the slipper are very commonly used disciplinary implements from the UK whereas the large wooden school paddle tends to be thought of as an American implement. 

We rarely use the cane in Punished Brats videos, not because we are unable to or that our girls are unwilling (hey, I like the cane!) but more so because of the member feedback we receive.  For every positive email we receive in response to a caning scene, we will receive three or more stating they wished a different implement had been used.  US members are not as familiar with the cane growing up and so they don’t have as strong of an emotional connection to it, and European members will sometimes balk at an American using a traditionally UK implement.  I totally get that. 

It’s likewise with the tawse, the slipper, and even the carpet beater.  I hadn’t heard of any of those implements being used for a spanking until I became more heavily involved in the world of adult consensual spanking.  Perhaps that’s just my naivety though?  With the world seeming to forever becoming more and more of a cultural melting pot, are implements being introduced around the world whereas they once were only traditionally used in one country or another?

Is the wooden spoon a southern US implement?  Or is it European (both my German grandmother and my husband’s grandmother were quite fond of the wooden spoon!).  Is the hairbrush universal?  It sure does seem to be everywhere I look, the dreaded thing. 

So tell me.  How much does your own cultural background influence your preference today as far as implements?  Are you drawn towards those that you experienced or heard about most when you were growing up?  Or now that you are aware of the wide variety of spanking toys available, are you open to more?

I’ll kick it off by answering my own question first.  Personally, I experienced, witnessed, or heard about spankings being given by hand, belt, and small OTK paddle.  I also once heard about a girl getting spanked by her mom with a phone, but I think that was much more a matter of what was at hand rather than a true implement.  That could get expensive and my goodness, what did the person on the other end of the line think??? 

Anyway, looking at it now, I’d say that those are indeed the implements I hold dearest.  I’m certainly happy to feel the sting of many, many others, but I don’t have the close emotional connection to say the hairbrush or the spoon or even the formal strap that many others do.  The slipper is totally foreign to me as is the carpet beater.  However, when I was at an antique shop recently, I spied a rattan carpet beater for sale and considered purchasing it … just to satisfy my curiosity.  I quickly decided against that and my bottom thanked me. 

The results are in!  Yes, I know that the poll was up for just shy of a week, but I had the chance to film the video this weekend with the assistance of Lily Anna (who can be heard giggling at my misfortune off camera at least once!!).  Still, nearly 1300 individual votes (limited by IP address and cookies) were cast.  Thank goodness I didn’t opt to receive a spank per vote/comment this time!

In the lead from the very start was the hairbrush with the belt and paddle battling it out for second choice.  Sadly, the feather duster didn’t get enough write-in votes.  I’m going to have to make that a formal option next time around. 

I’ll edit the video and have it all set and ready to go for next week’s official blogiversary day on the 12th.  In the meantime, here is a frame grab from near the end of the video.  As you can see, it was one heck of a celebration spanking. 

My 3rd blogiversay is rapidly approaching!! On February 12th, it will be 3 years since I started this blog! I have never kept up with any other sort of journal or diary this long and this consistently. As is tradition, I plan to receive a fun little birthday style spanking to help celebrate the occasion and this personal achievement.

The first year, I asked readers to post and agreed to receive one swat for each comment I received on the blogiversary announcement entry. By year two, I wised up and said only one swat per unique individual.

This year, I’m going to do things a little differently.  Variety is the spice of life, no? 

As it’s year three, I am planning to do a 3 minute spanking with 3 different implements.  The first minute will be a hand spanking, but what is used for the next 2 minutes will be up to you.  My beloved husband will be dishing out the spanks using whatever implements you collectively decide on.

I have created a poll below for you to select the 2 implements you’d most like to see used in addition to the hand spanking.  The two implements that rank highest when the poll closes will be the ones that will be used for the final two minutes of my blogiversary spanking.

Here is the poll.  Please vote and help decide which implements they will be.  Remember, select 2 when voting!

I think most of the implements are familiar, but here is a small picture of Mr. Whippy just so you know what it its.

The poll is now closed.  Thank you to everyone who voted!  Results will be posted shortly. 

Whew!  I am one whooped Pixie.  It’s been a very busy week for me.  I’m not complaining at all as I’d much rather be busy than bored and looking for trouble.  >:)  We had a Punished Brats shoot this past Saturday which was awesome.  I am going to work on putting together the preview photos from each scene for Pixie’s Previews as well as typing up a little mini intro interview I did with our new brat, Lorraine.  She was so cute. 

She hadn’t done a spanking video before and while she had played a little in real life, it’s very different when trying to do four full length scenes within the span of a day.  She emailed me the next day to say she was still having trouble sitting down!  I can totally empathize with her as I took my share of hard spankings that day too.  Owww! 

And just yesterday I did another shoot where I did quite a few fun yet very firm scenes (details at a later date … am I a tease or what?) so I’m not real thrilled having to sit here at my desk chair at the moment.   There is another fabulous SSNY party being held tomorrow night, but I am going to sit (well, sorta) this one out as I need some time to rest and recover.  I’m bummed as I always love going to the parties, but I am trying to stick to my resolution of resting when I’m tired and giving my bottom a break as needed too.  Safety first!

Vanilla life has been jam packed too.  I was given two web site design projects to work on (fun), way too many doctor appointments (not so fun), and perhaps best of all, I was contacted by a gallery coordinator to discuss showcasing some of my photos this summer.  I had a meeting with the gentleman first thing this morning.  I was so nervous as we went through and he selected photos he’d like to display.  I squirmed and shifted in my chair, but that can’t be blamed all on anxiety.  Do you know what it’s like to sit on a wicker seat with a sore, spanked bottom?  Argh!  I kept thinking about Richard Windsor’s use of the term “naughty chair” and felt like that’s exactly what I’d been placed in.  At least it was not facing the corner.

The subject of complementary punishments has been on my mind after reading some of the comments that were left on the hot buttons and off buttons posts.  While I’m sure that this topic has been posed many times before, I’m up for giving it a ramble here.

Some punishments seem to go hand in hand with spanking.  A big one is corner time, which Todd & Suzy just wrote about in their roundtable question this week.  As I’ve mentioned before, I really struggle to do corner time.  Not only is it difficult because I am devoid of activity and forced to stand still, but it makes my anxiety soar to not know what’s going on behind me.  Ack!  I have to really trust a person to be willing to stand in the corner.  Even during shoots, I find it nerve wracking, but I understand the appeal and even necessity particularly in videos.  It gives the viewer a chance to admire the bare red bottom after the spanking in a semi-believable manner.  In real life, post-spanking corner time can give the spanker a chance to admire his or her handiwork as the spankee reflects on how he or she got into so much trouble in the first place.

Although my preference is for no corner time at all, if such a punishment is going to take place, I’d rather have it happen beforehand.  It still allows me to think about what misdeed I might have done and nervously anticipate the spanking I have earned.  I don’t see this occur in videos too much, but in real life play, this was more often how it occurred for me.  No right, no wrong, just different.

Enough about those pesky corners.  Another punishment that is frequently coupled with spanking is having to write lines.  It can be exceedingly tedious, but at least you’re doing something.  And you can always try to slip in a few words that weren’t dictated or insert little heart bubbles over the “i”s to make sure the top is on his toes when reviewing the completed piece.  Writing lines can be a punishment in itself, but it has an extra zing to it if you have to do them while seated on a hard chair with a freshly spanked bottom.  And of course if those extra words or heart bubbles are discovered, there might be a few extra smacks delivered upon review!

Mouth soaping seems to be a pretty controversial punishment these days.  For every eager request that I receive to feature a spanking scene on PB that includes a mouth soaping, there is an equally heartfelt comment saying that such treatment is an awful sight.  Simply a matter of diverse preferences.  I have never been given a mouth soaping as a part of a real life punishment, probably because until recently, the closest I’d come to a swear word was fiddlesticks.  I have since picked up a few bad phrases (mostly uttered at road warriors on the highway), but nothing too terrible. 

I don’t mind doing a mouth soaping scene, but by no means is it a pleasant experience.  Even those pretty little soaps that smell like fruit do NOT taste very nice.  I suppose that is a good thing as ingesting soap is generally not recommended and may contain chemicals (such as lye) that can cause severe complications.  I was a bit disturbed once when I received an email from a reader describing a “true life” punishment session that included drinking a fairly large quantity of liquid dish detergent.  The purpose was to make the ordeal unpleasant immediately as it tasted terrible, but act as a further punishment later on when it would cause cramping and major intestinal distress.  To each their own (provided it’s consensual and safe … in this case I think it crossed a line), but I’m hoping this was one of those times when a fantasy was simply being claimed as reality.

Wow, I really did ramble on here.  Hope you will ramble back at me.  :)  What other punishments do you find commonly practiced in conjunction with spanking?   What are your likes or dislikes?

I had the pleasure of doing an interview with Spank Place earlier this week.  I was asked a lot of really cool, thought provoking questions such as …

• You were saying in a rant that the sub shouldn’t be too eager to jump over the top’s lap. Let’s be clear that we only approve of consensual spankings. In terms of a spanking fantasy, is being forced to submit to a spanking against your will a fantasy that you’ve had?

• I’ve heard someone say that there is a skill to being a sub in a scene. Are you better in the scenes you’re in now than when you first started out? What changed?

• How do you like to be spanked in a scene? How is this different, if at all, from a private spanking with your husband? 

•  There seems to be a few different kinds of subs, some like the physical feeling of being spanked, others like the “roleplay” (getting told off) part and others like the humiliation or the attention or the loss of control. What is it about spanking that you’re into? If you like the physical feeling do you like the pain as it is happening or the feeling afterwards?

… and lots more.

 Want to know what I said?  Then, check out my interview at www.SpankPlace.com.

Last week I wrote a post about hot buttons.  About what minor elements in a scene can take a scene from good to fantastic.  Of course these are all personal preferences and what can make a scene great for one person can be of little significance to another or could even be a total turn off.  We are individuals with very different tastes even though we share a common interest in spanking.

So just as there are these minor elements that can be a total turn on for an individual, there are just as many turn offs.  What is a big thrill for one person may have just the opposite effect on someone else. 

Lee suggested that I do a post on these turn offs and I had to ponder for a bit if I was going to follow through even though I think it would be an interesting topic.  My only concern is that I didn’t want anyone to become upset or offended if someone else were to strongly state their opinions and preferences.  While that has certainly occurred several times on my blog already, this topic could truly court conflict.  Still, I think it is far too interesting a topic to neglect and it could spark some good conversation.

So with all that said, let’s get down to business.  What are your turn offs?  What could potentially spoil a scene (whether one being viewed or one you’re participating in) for you and why? 

Here are a few of mine:

 Humiliation and insults regarding a girl’s weight and appearance.  This is a big one for me and in fact I have been considering doing a rant post on this topic in the future.  I wrote a long ramble one night after being upset by seeing such a video, but again, I was cautious about broaching such a potentially touchy subject.

 Face slapping.  The occasional single slap when a girl is really back talking her mother is ok, but for some reason face slapping generally makes me cringe.  I want to see the girl’s bottom cheeks slapped, not her facial cheeks.

 Sexual acts or suggestions in scenes depicting family members (father/daughter, uncle/niece).  Yes, I know it’s all role play, but it’s a limit for me.

 A lot of cursing from the spanker, particularly cursing at the spankee.

 Spankees that remain completely motionless and truly look bored or about to fall asleep during their punishment. 

So those are mine.  Hopefully none of what I said was too heavy nor too upsetting to anyone.  And just one final cautionary statement from worry wart Pixie here.  Please remember there is no right or wrong.  It’s all just a matter of personal preference. 

Are you seeing spots??

Or maybe stripes.

 Sometimes a tiny detail can make all the difference.  I’ve been known to fall in love with a song for the way a harmony is sung or includes a single lyric that resonates with me.  In a similar way, a spanking scene can go from good to great if it captures even a fleeting yet powerful detail.  I know that I’m far from alone in constantly searching for that certain something, but what that “certain something” is tends to be different for each of us.

It can be a the way the spankee’s bottom lip trembles when she knows she’s about to get spanked.  Or a word a spanker uses during the lecture.  Something as basic as the implement that is chosen for punishment.  Or as is often the case, it can have little to do with the spanking itself and be a seemingly minor detail to most. 

I’ve received a number of comments and emails over the past few years from people specifying what their spanking hot button is - what detail really makes a scene for them - and of course requesting the inclusion of more material that satisfies their desire.    Here is a short (ok, maybe not so short) list of some that have been mentioned to me.

 shoes - mary janes, saddle shoes, high heels, flats, platforms, flip flops, Teva sports sandals, boots, barefoot

 socks - knee socks, knee socks that aren’t white, ankle socks, athletic socks with stripes at the top, lacy socks, socks with little pom poms on the ankle

 panties - I know I’ve had many a blog post on this never ending debate about the preferred style of panty

 hair - long hair, short hair, curly hair, straight hair, hair in pig tails, hair in a pony tail, hairstyle of the spankee, hairstyle of the spanker, hair errrm down there, hair, Hair, HAIR!

 accessories - hoop earrings, barrettes, panty hose, thigh highs, rings, nail polish, lack of any accessories

 clothing in general - school uniforms, bathing suits, cheerleading outfits, rain coats, dresses, jeans, pajamas, low cut tops on the bottoms and high cut shorts on the tops (this is getting confusing), not a stitch of material at all

 positions - not just OTK versus bent over, but how the spanker and spankee are angled, a particular piece of furniture that is used as a prop, the spankee’s struggle to get out of position, the spanker’s struggle to get the spankee back into position

 resemblance - how much a spankee or spanker looks like someone famous or reminds you of someone you know - a favorite teacher, your strict stepmom, that brat at the grocery store checkout that always snaps her gum and rolls her eyes and probably deserves a good spanking

 storyline - the bad girl, the good girl, the innocent victim, the brat, the boss, the role reversal, a specific offense, talking back, eager submission

 everything else - a look, a way of kicking, a word, a hair flip, a color of clothing, inclusion of other punishments such as corner time, mouth soaping, line writing, etc.

And that’s just to name a few!

These hot buttons cover a fairly wide range of interests and can often conflict with one another.  But that’s because we are all highly individualized with our own set of unique ideals even though we may all fall under the greater umbrella of spanking enthusiasts.  There is none that is wrong nor right.  It’s all about personal preference.  I’ve listed several hot buttons that have been shared with me (and a few of my own mixed in there as well), but what are yours?  Do tell.

It’s almost 2010!  I wish everyone a very happy, healthy, and prosperous New Year.

I’m not usually one to make New Year’s resolutions.  I don’t like making resolutions solely for the sake of tradition … only to break them about two weeks later.  However, I fairly regularly set goals for myself throughout the year.  They can be small ones like cleaning out a closet by the end of the week or much bigger ones like pushing through social anxiety to attend parties.   I’ve had varying degrees of success and some I have to try over and over (anyone remember my goal of trying to drink more water?).   

This year however, I will be joining in trying to turn over a new leaf in the New Year.  Maybe a few leaves.  My self-challenge is to find Balance.  I mean this in several ways.  I’d like to achieve better balance in a physical sense - I’m incorporating stretching, flexibility, and core/balance exercises into my normal cardio and strength training routines.  But perhaps more importantly I want to strike a better balance in other areas of life as well. 

I have a tough time relaxing and enjoying the moment.  I’m always thinking a thousand steps ahead, worrying about everything, and pushing to accomplish just one more thing before I collapse into bed.  Maybe it will sound odd to some, but it’s going to be an incredibly difficult struggle to kick back and relax on a regular basis.  And as much as I want to, it’s daunting. 

So what does this mean?  Well, a few examples of concrete goals I’m setting for myself are:

- Take another real vacation like I did when I was on my honeymoon, meaning no internet access - no blogging, no emails, no editing, no worries for a few days. Disconnect and rediscover the offline world on occasion. Nothing terrible will happen. Errr … right?

- Put together a schedule and establish more clear work hours (easy part), downtime (hard part), and stick to it (really hard part). This may mean occasionally being a day late on a blog post or in replying to an email if other responsibilities need to take priority and take up more time. It doesn’t at all mean that I don’t care, it only, only, only means that I’m working on finding that elusive balance and can’t cram everything into 24 hours sometimes no matter how hard I try.

- For the time being, I’m going to let my MySpace and FetLife accounts go quiet and I won’t take up Twitter. I’ve already done so recently for the most part, but I’ve felt guilty about it. The goal is to feel ok with it. I’ll leave the profiles up in case I wish to become active again in the future, but I won’t be logging in for messages. Please email me instead and I promise I will reply. Oh, the only exception to my MySpace goal is that I will log in to leave comments on Erica’s blog because that is one of the primary reasons I made a MySpace profile in the first place.

- Play piano, draw, dust off my violin, read, take photos, hike, sew, listen to music, garden, play with the cats, take a bubble bath, watch TV, see a movie, or any number of other activities that have taken a far backseat for a while now. Do them, enjoy them, and not try to rush through as fast as I can so that I can get on to the next thing on my to-do list. In other words, chill.

So why am I posting about this here?  Well, because 1) it’s my blog and I wanted to 2) I wished to post an explanation of why I’m not active on FetLife and MySpace and state that there may be subtle changes in response time to comments and emails and 3) so that I’ll be more likely to stick to my resolutions.  It helps to firmly establish a goal by writing it down.  It really helps to establish it by writing it down and posting it for any and all to see!  Hopefully that will result in both encouragement and motivation. 

I won’t be getting spanked for breaking any of these “rules” or failing to meet goals though.  While a good spanking can help act as a motivating factor or reminder to get back on track in some cases, I’m not sure this is one of them for me.  But hopefully by achieving better balance, it will help me to continue to be healthier, happier, and continue to love life - both the vanilla and spanking sides - to the fullest.